Fortunately you do not mean it literally. I had some trouble with a certain young lady, and he offered to try and shake her off me--for a price.

The attempt didn't quite render the result I'd hoped for, but I was still bound to uphold my end of the bargain. He promised neither to kill me nor to run me into the poorhouse, and so I'm paying his lease--their lease--for six months. It's my name on the contract.

It was a bit of a nasty trick stringing me along and leading me to the very apartment like he did, too.

I hope you won't let word of this get around.